Monday, November 26, 2007

Thinking Inside the Box


I spent a lot of time wondering what to write about next. I want to utilize this blog thing even know I don’t really understand why people are so attracted to it. But I also didn’t want to go on another venting rampage. Oh, the Ugly Troll is bitter, and has many things to vent about; many things that electrify my opinions. But what?

I think about things said to me or even in passing. I see things from the companies trying to network with other companies. That’s when it hits me! What are these other companies trying to do? They….we…I…am trying to get business, your business, while in turn, give what we can to those who buy. If they don’t buy, maybe they know someone who will. So I thought on that concept a while, which lead me to the standard, but overly used, catch phrase….”thinking outside the box.”

There is where I decided to start writing something. Could the problem with business; hell, society as a whole, be that we are trying way too hard to think outside this mythical box? Many times I’ve heard or read how life is so much harder and faster now. So why are we trying to make it worse by trying to be outside the box? What’s wrong with the “box” as it is?

Think of this “box” as a child’s room. Is there anything wrong with the room? Yes! It’s messy. Do you build a new room, a new house, because the room you have needs a little cleaning? Same goes for business, social lives, relationships, and anything else….why get rid of the “box” when all you need to do is clean up and make some room. Yeah there might be some hard choices as to what to throw away and what to keep. But it isn’t a new “box” we need; it’s the effort to clean up what we have.

I feel that thinking outside the box is a cop-out from just doing what comes naturally. What is it that coaches teach the athlete??? Do they say we got to get back to the outside of the box!? NO….they teach fundamentals and they say when things aren’t going the right way then go back to the basics. Do them right before you do anything else…..before you go outside the box take care of what’s inside the box first!

So, I end this thought with a shameless plug for Ugly Troll Greeting Designs, Inc. which is your simple, basic, humorous greeting card company. Instead of emailing a friend, send them a card. Tell them they are a loser as you would in that email. We have those types of cards too! Go back into the box, and say it with a troll!

~Chief Troll

Thursday, November 22, 2007

Ugly Troll Thanksgiving


The year is almost over. Thanksgiving is here and as with everyone else, the Chief Troll is going to sit down, eat till is gut almost explodes, then retire to watch the game. If history repeats itself, then I should be in La-la land by the first game's half time.

But Thanksgiving is not just about eating, football, and sleeping. No, it really is about giving thanks for those in our lives we love, we like, we respect, and maybe those things not so good. I speak from personal experience. This year, 2007, has been a pretty rough year for this Ugly Troll. "It has been the best of times and the worst of times.."

It started out as plain and typically messed up as any other year in my life, but that all changed....When we signed the legal papers putting the Ugly Troll Greeting Designs concept into the world of reality. But before it even went two months, I had to put my dog to rest at a young age 13. Well, that wasn't good, cause the stress of that was the final straw and I had a heart attack. So before the first quarter of 2007 was done, I had a new business, a dead dog, and a heart attack.

What could possibly make it any better!!! (being sarcastic) The spring months were filled with grief and followups with the doctor. Then I went on a tear of marketing...a letter campaign and follow up calls. It was somewhat successful, but nearly what was expected (for the money). So where is the "best of times?"

I suppose one could say it's not all that "best" but for this old troll, yeah, it is. I finally got the promotion that has eluded me for years....several cartoons/cards have been generated because of this. I'm still kicking....the pain of losing my little Misty, has subsided and I got another dog. I'm still married (20 years), and the Ugly Troll, well.......it still is a business. It's more of a worst of times since it's a challenge getting people to buy what seems normal to me, but maybe not others. But it's still here...no money....but still alive.

So what can I be thankful for?! This has been quite a ride. I've met some really wonderful people, I've been shown that some people in business aren't just out for a buck they want others to get that buck too! I've seen interest; interest that made me feel worth something.

Yeah, it's been a rough year both personally and professionally; but, it's been a real joy to talk with the people I've talked to and the things I've learned. The folks here at FastPitch! have been remarkable with helping this troll figure out certain problems. Of course I have to mention Nicole and Matt again. They are tops!

I could go on, but it's safe to say that there isn't enough space her to write, nor would you even read it, to mention all the people who I'd like to say thanks to.

Ok, enough mushy, gushy, warm and fuzzy crap. Time to get back under the bridge!!

The Ugly Troll wishes all who read this, a fantastic, and happy Thanksgiving!!


~Chief Troll

Monday, November 19, 2007

IS THERE ANY HUMANITY LEFT IN BUSINESS?

I remember when I decided to try my hand at this business thing and why I did it. I was tired of working for people who don't seem to care about the people who work for them. The worker is always being treated like a nave; a subserviant turd who isn't supposed to have a life but their job.

I've seen all types, the fake kindness, the idiots, the yes-men, and those who must have done something to, for, or with, the powers that be. So, that's why the Ugly Troll came into being. So, I can make my own choices, and if by the grace of God, I get big enough to have employees...to treat them with the respect and understanding which is every individual's right to have...by people whether they are a coworker or a boss.

So I take this thought and move to the question (and title of this episode) is there any humanity left in business? When I started this company, I heard from all types of "business partners" how they want to grow with me and foster a relationship with the Troll. Then as time wore on, it seemed that this desire waned and then the typical (what I expected all along) actions came out. The excellent customer service wasn't so excellent, the due dates and delivery dates seemed to always get pushed back, and the excuses became less believable and the frustration of business set it. Not to mention the way it makes me look at people who run the business.

Well, there are two people who stepped up and without even knowing it actually made me think that maybe there is still humanity left in the business world.

The first person was Matt Best, (he looked a lot like Ken Jennings from Jeopardy). Matt is the owner of Best Solutions (http://www.somedayisland.com/home.html). He met me at a Chamber of Commerce mixer and offered his help with networking. Now he is a "coach" but he did it for free......even after being asked about cost. He just wanted to. (he is why the Troll speaks in this forum today).

The second person is Nicole Friedman. Nicole and I met at a Chamber mixer that was held at where she works CPARC (Cumberland Perry Association for Retarded Citizens)http://www.cparc.org . Now, just by working at CPARC shows that she is a special type of person, but what she did for me was cooler than cool.
Nicole emailed Trogh's brewing company and aked them to use my cartoons for beer lables. Needless to say, they shot her down like a lead balloon, but it wasn't the result it was the fact she put herself out to help another person grow their business.

These people could have charged me for what they did or just never even bothered at all, but they chose to help the Ugly Troll......for nothing.

So, my friends and associates, as the famous words of Ted Theodore Logan and Bill S. Preston, esquire tell us......"be excellent to each other...and....PARTY ON DUDES!" But try to do the first one the best.

So thanks Matt and Nicole for being truly wonderful people.


~Chief Troll




Saturday, November 10, 2007

The Frustration of the Troll


Hello to you the curious of what goes on in the mind of a troll. As you can tell, or maybe you can't, but this is my first ever blog. I still not sure why they are so exciting to people, but why not do one?!

OK, why is this troll frustrated? Cause although I've busted my ass trying to sell my cards, people are just not getting it. Anyone and everyone who sees an Ugly Troll card laughs and laughs. But these laughs are not translating to sales.

The frustration starts as we close up on our first year of existence. We've taken our money and put that and our trust into some people who used the the wonderful phrase, we want to partner up with you. We want you to grow so then we can grow. HA! Start with the web site...the first people hit the mark right out of the gate, design-wise, but continual execution was a complete failure. Soooo, now we have to put more money into another web place to not only fix the problems of the old company but make a working shopping cart.

Ok that seems to be done, but it has created enough work for me to go back in and clean up the water marks that were put on for copyright sake. Ok so there is extra work...got it. The second slap came with paying our "marketing" guy a bunch of money to do what I had already planned. There was nothing new to show for the money. We did all the leg work and other stuff. I'm now discovering some cool networking and marketing things.....none from the company I paid money to, to get this type of information.

So, since our inception in January, nothing has been going in our way. So there it is my new friends, my first post of my firt blog. I hope you enjoyed this visit into the mind of the Chief Troll. Thank you for stopping by.


~Chief Troll